Archive for October, 2008


October 18, 2008

Compromising is an interesting concept as it involves two people reaching half way to each other.  I hear so many stories about it in my store.  Today a woman was telling me about her “evil” neighbor who took the back of her planter off to build his fence.  They will not use a mediator which was offered to them.  Last night, he apparently put sugar in her gas tank and that will cost alot too.  These people are in their late 60s or earl 70s.

Unfortunately,  this made me remember my arch nemesis Carlos and his daughter Lea who made my life a living hell as only neighbors can.  The really good memory from them was when the mom was still alive.  The first Christmas she gave us this delicious looking fudge.  Took a bite, spit it out and determined that she used bacon fat instead of butter or margarine.  After she died,  I missed the annual joke which was never meant to be cruel as she was sweet but scared K & E   because of her giant skin tags, wens or  whatever you call them.  A fearful vision really.


Hard times

October 15, 2008

My sister died last week which leaves a hole in the family.  The first loss of a sibling in 13 children and so devastating no matter what I get busy with as I find myself crying many times.  I was singing for a couple of hours:  Oh lord won’t you buy me a Mercades Benz and then realized that was Lynda’s favorite song and she could sing it with heartbreak.

It is also sad that she was in such denial about her health but think maybe she got tired of living through the pain.  I am 63 and can already see how it just becomes too much and too hard to do it everyday.  When people start discussing medications,  I tell them that I take them so that I won’t shoot them with a gun.  Garners many a laugh but it has a touch of truth in it.

The term:  she lights up a room fits Lynda and also my daughter Kate.  Life is strange and I won’t stop grieving until I am done.

Heavy heart

October 7, 2008

It is amazing that a heavy heart actually feels the way it sounds.  I lost my sister this week and she is the first of 13 to die.  It was not unexpected but is is easy to say that until it really happens.  Death of someone younger is also shocking as it reminds all of the family that we are getting older and it becomes more of a possibility.  Still,  the rest of us are very healthy and come from that strong peasant stock.  I feel sad and am tearful and there is a child inside me that wants to run away and not face the goodbye memorial service.  Grown ups have to experience feelings that are sad as much as we wish we didn’t have to.  I want to make this a growth for me  and experience my emotions.  Strange how difficult it is to mourn and feel one’s own feelings.  I mourn my sister’s death because of her choices led to it but then I remember the pain she was in and how life is often just to hard to do anymore.


October 3, 2008

Library is not the only game in town anymore.  The branch on State Street and Collister is open and I finally got there today.  Small and no nonsense,  this library has computers for little ones all in a line.  One little boy started crying cause there was no music when he was coloring in his red car.  Wow,  he has already learned being both spoiled and a multi tasker.

Just in time for the Palin and Biden debate.  I don’t thing attacking Barrack Obama is the world’s best advice but perhaps it will cover her lack of knowledge about the government and making me at times ashamed to be a women.  I cannot wish her well.